Posts by Mrs. Fiorini

69

Can't speak with me, unless they need something

by Stan Conroy in

jw
friends

after many, many years outside of the jw world, my elderly parents finally decided to give me an ultimatum.

i either rejoin the jw's or they will never speak with me again.

apparently my brother is going to get the same choice.

Mrs. Fiorini

Even if some elder bodies follow the advice in the elder book not to DF people for associating with DF/DA relatives, they keep this information pretty well hidden. If you ask a r&f JW if they could be DFd for doing it, the vast majority would say yes. Otherwise you would see few family members participating in shunning. And since WT article after WT article tells them they should, the natural conclusion among JWs is that they will be punished if they don't follow those rules. This is an understandable conclusion since they will be DFd for associating with non-family who are DF/DA.

IMO the WT wants it that way. They are at risk for bad publicity if they get a lot of people going public with stories about being kicked out of the org for speaking to their own family. Yet they can get the JWs to act that way anyway because they believe they will be DFd for doing it.

As someone who is being shunned by family members myself, (I'm not DF/DA to my knowledge, but started attending another church years after leaving the WT, which is what led to the shunning) I know they would not do this if they didn't feel they had to. I happen to know that it hurts them to do it.

19

How Do I Discover Myself And Build My Self-Esteem After Realizing The Truth About 'the truth'?

by african GB Member in

jw
friends

some of those of us who are still in find it difficult to get on with our lives after discovering the wt lies.

we keep going to the meetings for family.

sitting there for hours affects one psychologically, especially when those in good standing boast about the new system,how bad people will be destroyed, and how good they are in the eyes of jehovah.

Mrs. Fiorini

Heaven,

Very interesting idea. I would love to see it explored more. And I'm happy to participate.

Mrs. F

69

Can't speak with me, unless they need something

by Stan Conroy in

jw
friends

after many, many years outside of the jw world, my elderly parents finally decided to give me an ultimatum.

i either rejoin the jw's or they will never speak with me again.

apparently my brother is going to get the same choice.

Mrs. Fiorini

Stan,

It is my understanding that "necessary family business" includes them needing your help since they are elderly and you are their son.

I'm so sorry you're being treated this way by your own parents. It hurts my heart to hear about it.

36

JW grandma, unbelieving grandpa and DF'd daughter - babysitting rules

by Bonnie_Clyde in

jw
friends

the grandma just got some instructions from one of the elders on how to handle babysitting her infant grandchild.

when the daughter brings the baby to the house, she should hand it to the grandpa.

(that's ok because grandpa has never been baptized).

Mrs. Fiorini

how is it i can still be stunned and amazed by anything b0rg???

I'm with Chickpea. I know they're nuts, but still!!

There's no doubt in my mind that the best thing I ever did for myself was to get out of there!

8

Invited back to the meetings but not invited into their lives

by truthseeker in

jw
friends

it never ceases to amaze me that dubs are happy when they invite an inactive one back to the hall but would never take the extra step and invite them into their life, not even for a simple meal.. it's nice to see you at the meetings and that's as far as it will ever get.. does the social aspect of christianity not apply to them?.

please share your experiences if you were invited back to the hall but not invited back to their house..

Mrs. Fiorini

Friendships in the WT world are an odd dynamic. I wonder if it's because on some level they know it's so conditional. With the high turnover rate that is common to cults, those relationships can (and often do) end at any time.

Also, since everyone is expected to spy and report on each other, some people may have a heightened need for privacy where they can be themselves, instead of putting on the show. I wonder if that's how the elder who criticized VS77 feels. That might explain his comment, which was quite rude.

Just my speculations.

19

How Do I Discover Myself And Build My Self-Esteem After Realizing The Truth About 'the truth'?

by african GB Member in

jw
friends

some of those of us who are still in find it difficult to get on with our lives after discovering the wt lies.

we keep going to the meetings for family.

sitting there for hours affects one psychologically, especially when those in good standing boast about the new system,how bad people will be destroyed, and how good they are in the eyes of jehovah.

Mrs. Fiorini

Welcome Lime.

I've often wondered what it would be like going back to the KH now that I know it's a cult.

54

What Did You Do With All Your Watchtower Publications?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i needed room when i moved so i sadly threw my entire library away.

i mentioned this to an exjw.

he and his wife took all the hundreds of books, including bound volumes from the 1800s and are now using them for research and proof of watchtower lies.. what did you do with your books?.

Mrs. Fiorini

WuzLovesDubs said, "Eventually he himself threw away all his hard bound volumes because his JW elder step father had done so saying he only needed the CD now and it was dangerous to leave Jehovahs books laying around where they could get into apostate hands."

Do they realize what they are saying? They convict themselves with their own words.

48

Why Do So Many DF'd End In Some Sort Of Trouble?

by african GB Member in

jw
friends

most ex-jw's df/da that i know end up living a dangerous life.

some get into drugs, prostitution, gangsterism,etc.

as a result they prove the jw theory that says "whoever leaves jehovah's organisation won't make it" right.. it's difficult for me to say this, but it seems like jw's are partly right on this one.. why do most ex-dubs end up in a predicament of some sort?

Mrs. Fiorini

Something to consider when discussing this topic is whether the percentage of ex-JWs who "get in trouble" is more or less than current JWs, some of whom get caught and only reproved, others of whom do not get found out. And how well would either of these figures compare with people who have never been JWs?

Another thing to think about is what definition is being used to describe "getting in trouble"? For JWs voting, celebrating holidays, attending another church, etc. are all sins. If they see an ex-JW who has grown a beard, acquired a tatoo, and is smoking a cigarette on their way into a bar, will they conclude the person is getting in trouble? What if the ex-JW is gay? Will they conclude that he/she must be living a morally debauched lifestyle? Those things are all legal, just not in WT land.

8

What's the point?

by Chalam in

jw
friends

so i had a knock at the door this morning.

had a late one on here last night so i was still asleep.

ran down stairs thinking it was a delivery as i was expecting a couple of packages.

Mrs. Fiorini

Your story reminded me of an experience I had when I was a pioneer. We were invited in by a lovely young Christian woman. She was so kind, accepting of us, and enthusiastic about her beliefs. We had a conversation where she shared her faith with us in a way that also accepted ours. While we had no success in trying to interest her in our version of "the truth", it was a pleasant conversation for all of us. When I left her home I remember thinking, "She is just like me, except my religion is the truth and her religion is wrong."

I always remembered her and what a beautiful person she was. Sometimes I would meet others who I knew were good people, but who I also knew would never convert to my "true" religion. It would bother me to think that Jehovah would destroy such persons simply because they mistakenly got involved with the wrong religious organization.

All those incidents were filed away in the back of my mind and eventually reached critical mass when I finally was able to see my way out of the WT.

3

China: New System Role Model?

by cameo-d in

the post-denominational era chinese churches on the way towards unity.

(case study) .

publication: the ecumenical review.

Mrs. Fiorini

Interesting article. I'm not an expert on Chinese Christianity, but I do know that in Asian cultures there is a greater tendency towards conformity than in Western cultures. Perhaps this is a factor.